Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Easter is on its way!

I love this bunny that hangs above my french doors.  She's full of color, reminds me of spring and she's free flowing.

I purchased this large bunny a couple of years ago from Pier 1 Imports.  She holds candy for the grandchildren when they come over.

The fireplace mantel is freshened up for Spring also.  I didnt do as much as I normally do this year.  Energy level isnt quite there yet.  I'm happy that I"m back at things and doing fairly well. I dont know if any of you have noticed but it seems the stores just arent carrying much these days.  I think they are spooked about the economy and dont want to get stuck holding all kinds of leftover merchandise.  I get that, but at least could they carry something different and unique????  Where I live there arent many choices to shop..so its very limited.  My favorite place is normally Target, they carry alot of seasonal merchandise and its usually quite different.  This year, i didnt feel they had much.  Oh well, I guess that means I'll hang onto my money for the "hopeful" vacations I may get this year.  In 2 weeks we plan to drive to Oklahoma to visit our son.  I'm looking forward to the drive and change of scenery.  I'm getting quite tired of doctor appts and treatment and this whole new life "cancer".  I want to put it away in a box and never have it come out again.  Is that possible?

Monday, February 20, 2012

Pretty Lights

One of my weaknesses is pretty soft lights.  I visited a blogger the other day,,lord knows my "treatment" brain cannot remember, BUT I do remember she had a chandelair (sp) above her kitchen sink. I loved the idea, but since I do not own this home--or have the money right now-to purchase one, I found this idea to be the next best thing.  AND..inexpensive. At Pottery Barn I found this crystal little candle light.  We hung it above the sink and its absolutely peaceful and stunning at night.  My picture is blurry, forgive me but I'm still learning this camera after 3 years.  I really didnt have time with work, and other obligations to really sit down and play with this camera.  I'm trying now--but its not easy for me.  I am thinking I may have to look into another camera..as I dont like this one.  Anyhow, I love this little candle light--I just pop in a tealight at night and I have my mini kitchen chandelair!  I know that spelling is OFF!

This lamp was given to me on my recent birthday by my cousin.  I love it!  I like turning it on during the day just for the glow. I'm learning one of my addictions is crystal lamps, candleholders etc.  Its to bad I dont have a Mcmansion to get hundreds lol.   

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Happy Valentines Day!

These are some new plates I found at Marshalls this weekend.  Reminded me of Spring, so i bought 2. Thats right 2, so if baldyman breaks one--which is very likley...I dont know what i will do!  for now...I'm going to enjoy them.

This is my dining room light fixture, if you look closely you will see my little heart birds on it.  I thought they were adorable!

AND..what is Valentines day without a candle, this is my Valentines Candle that I made, called Best Friends!  I purchased some tin lamp tops and as you can see they are pretty nice.  These will fit on most candles, I wanted to see how they look so I'm checking them out tonight.  so far, so good!

AND....drum roll, here is our meal.  Rib eye steak, lobster, fingerling pototoes and carrots.  It was better than good.  I ate every morsel and am so grateful to God my appetite is back!  Not that I dont need to keep losing weight..I do..but when stuff like this comes up--Im first in line.

And my husbands famous greek salad.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE this salad...sad thing is the treatment I'm taking for my cancer is messing with my tongue and i had to give this up due to sores on my tongue.  Well tonight i decided to try it again..and it tasted as wonderful as I remember it,,but nope its very irritating to my tongue so I cannot have seconds or finish it off at 10PM like I used to do.  I ate so much salad I'm surprised I didnt turn into a piece of lettuce.   So that was our homecooked Valentines meal...It rocked.  We also had chocolate covered strawberries of which I did not take a picture..those completed the meal just wonderfully.  Now, its back to clean up and then hot tub time...and then Hope Floats!~  I hope all of you did something wonderful for yourself, or your family.  Valentines Day is my absolute favorite day of the year.  Nothing better than loving and being loved!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

54th Birthday and Valentines Day!

Today I turned 54.  Every day, every birthday is much more precious when you have a serious illness. I intend on celebrating everything, and not feel guilty about that extra slice of pizza, or cake, or drink!  AND of course I want presents..lots of them..I'll use them lol.  Someone asked me yesterday, do you feel older?  and nope I dont...I dont feel i look older, (yet) and I dont feel like my mind thinks older...but when I get up from the chair or couch,,,my bones remind me, I'm not that young anymore.  otherwise, no i do not.  I think the 50's is the new 30's.  Women are looking beautiful well into old age these days...gorgeous.  If i could lose more weight, tone up--I wouldnt mind myself to much.  A never ending journey that is.  I'm so eager for spring, I cant stand it anymore. I purchased some pretty flowery, bird plates in anticipations.  I'll have to take a picture and post it this week.  It just feels like spring is in the air, its knocking.  I"m soooo excited!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012


Ok this made me think.  I"m tired of thinking actually, lol.  Seems thats all I do since I got sick.  BUT..since a free banner is involved I continue to think!  For me, since all these life changes have taken place for me, my thoughts are usually on, finding a way of doing something that will not only be fun in the moment,,but leave a legacy of memories.  When your faced with a terminal illness, you truly learn what it means to live in the moment, the day, the hour, the minute.  Along with that, comes thoughts of wanting to get out there and embrace life.  Do something that makes you laugh, laugh hard...and also leaves memories for yourself and those you love.  I'm focused on doing hopefully a couple of vacations this year.  I've always wanted to camp by the ocean, and go to sleep listening to the waves and awaken listening to more waves. I want to take my bucket of ice cold coronas down to the seashore and watch the ocean, the birds, the sky, and if I"m lucky a dolphin!  I want to feast on fresh lobster, that isnt overly priced because it has to be shipping into my state.  In other words, seconds!!!! heck maybe thirds!  I want to laugh, laugh all day, go to sleep laughing.  I want those around me-those who care about me, to see that just because your faced with an illness, you can still get up every day and embrace what life may offer you.  Thats my note to self....keep working on making that camping on the ocean come to life...real soon..the waves are calling!

Monday, February 6, 2012

My Reading Corner

Hi all, its been awhile. Seems to be the same thing I say everytime I come on the blog.  Lots of changes for me in the last couple of months.  I'm now done working.  I officially went on Long Term Disability and my last week was last week.  I simply cannot do that job full time--not even part time.  They need help and my little assistance of 15 hours a week made me feel guilty.  Soo I let go.  My long term disability will cover my health insurance hopefully until Medicaid kicks in which is 2 plus years away.  Finding out about all this is pretty disconcerting.  It takes 6 months to get SSDI...and then another month to get the check..so really its 7 months for that.  For Medicaid it takes 2 years, AFTER you get your SSDI.  I think they hope you die before they have to insure you.  Anyhow, for now--for today I am ok.  I still have my  health insurance and should be able to care for that until I am eligible for Medicaid.  I had my first set of scans right before Christmas and it showed the cancer diminishing.  My oncologist said I have alot of cancer--so I have a ways to go.  I have Cancer in my breast bone, my spine, my pelvic area and my ribs.  I can tell its lessning as I have no need for any type of pain meds right now.  I weaned myself off of Morphine, Oxycodone, and Naproxen.  I was on alot of meds those first couple of months.  Today I take nothing other than my daily Femara cancer pill and my IV treatment every 3 weeks.  I am on hormone therapy.  My body seems to be responding ok to treatment. My only side effects as of today are sore tongue and fatique.  I have had problems with my treatment lately, my veins will just not cooperate.  I had the port put in last Thursday and I'm recovering from that.  I think once this heals--it will be a blessing to NOT get poked again.  My blood tests continue to be great, my immune system is at its peak.  Despite needing to lose at least 75 lbs, being full of cancer in my bones,,,they say I'm healthy--I find that funny.   Its amazing how our bodies work and respond.  Anyhow I'll take that good news!

Currently, I'm working on my website and my business. I need to bring in some sort of extra income due to losing mine.  I pray God will bless my business and my efforts.  Its taking alot of work--I'm new at this and I'm finding it NOT easy.  Each day I try to list another product...

My family is doing well, everyone is healthy and good...and thats a blessing also.  When I got sick i received several books from people.  I was unable to read them due to lack of time but now that I'm not working I do have the time.  I also wanted to declutter my house.  I simply cannot stand all this little "foo foo" stuff anymore.  I cleared out my dining room somewhat and made myself a little corner by the patio doors so I can sit and read, pray etc.  I bought this new chair, added a small angel fountain, and hopefully once the cat understands this is my chair-not HIS..I will be able to sit and use it.  I like to watch the birds eat and play and this will be an awesome place to view that.  The blanket on the chair is special.  This blanket was prayed over for 5 days by my SIL and BIL church and people.  I put it over me and pray for God to heal my body and others who have cancer.  Stage 4 is scary...I try not to be scared.  My goal is to reach NED (no evidence of disease) and stay there for 25+ years.  Most of my posts will be Cancer related, I'm sorry if that isnt fun...but its my life now.  I still enjoy cooking, decorating etc...but the reality for me--is fighting daily to live.  I know that alot of bloggers prefer the "happy" the new items for the homes, etc...while thats fun..and a nice escape...I hope that some will find their way back to me--and help me on this journey.  I'm amazed at how one can buy a lamp and get 50 comments...one can post on something like this--and get none.  We need to support each other--life is NOT all decorating and "happy".  Its dam hard, its lonely, its scary.  I hope this dosnt offend anyone but I've seen alot of death, sickness and fear the last 4 months.  I'm not the same woman.  I'm a woman that has a deep heart and ache for all those hurting out there by this insideous disease.  Please join me in freindship, and prayer..and just support!