Well, I made it through both weddings. Thinking it was just a fluke of some sort. Perhaps nerves, I'm sure all parents nerves are shot when weddings come up. Fitting everything in, finances, work, making sure they have what they want. So, yes I figured my not feeling well was just stress. I notice though I'm doing less and less. Camping, I would go on a Friday, despite all the hard work, despite that in reality it's really only a day and a half, not 2 full days. Now, I refused to go unless I could leave on a Thursday or wed. I just didn't want to do all that work for such a short time. I also noticed I was struggling with my job. I know that it was stressful work, and I also knew that changes in management brought on more micro management. I simply couldn't handle both. I complained frequently, I was miserable. I no longer felt as if I were helping people, I felt as if I was just a controlled robot who catered to the whims of people who had been given enough chances and help, that by now we should be done giving to them. It was super frustrating. We had to document what we were doing every 15 minutes. They began calling our clients to make sure we held our home visits. Now, that was when I knew I had to find a way out. Calling violators of the law, to verify MY job was insane. If the client didn't like you, ohhh the destruction they could do. They were asked what time we arrived, what time we left. It had to match our detailed 15 minute time sheets. Crazy, crazy, crazy. I also noticed at work I began feeling and saying, I just don't feel good. And I didn't. Again, I figured it was the insane stress. I will continue this in a future blog post as there is a lot to say. I hope anyone reading this, enjoys my story.
SPRINGTIME ON THE MANTEL
2 days ago